The Passenger
The Passenger is © Francisco Alexandre de Freitas Alves
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It was a hell of a night. Having been dumped by his girlfriend, Alberto was alone in a pub, drinking the whole night, tortured by the memories of his lover. Almost senseless, he did not know that he caught ... the wrong taxi. That is how he was abandoned in the inter-dimensional crossroads. Now, Alberto must find his way back home. But each and every taxi that he catches, leads him to getting more and more lost and away from finding the driver who took him to this labyrinth. Will he escape from this nightmare? More importantly, will he get his girlfriend back? Follow his adventures, as the truth about the crossroads becomes more and more intriguing.
i think it´s a great work. Of course the plot line isn´t new,but what really makes the diference is how the comic is presented.For example, there a lot of historys with the concept of machines that erase memories, but "eternal sunshine of spotless mind" works it in a diferent level. I really would like to see how "The passenger" follow. Anyway, congratulations,the 9th place was not fair.
Thanks for being uninspired in your comments, Annibot ... As I said earlier, these are just eight pages ... The concept isn´t even fully presented here.
The art is interesting, but um, isn't this a mediocre TV show from the 80's called Quantum Leap? Sorry but there are better plot lines in the world.
That's great! I'll definitely be checking www.iam-thepassenger.com regularly.
Well guys, I think this is the end. I´m thankful to all the people who visited this little webcomic and put their insights. Congratulations for Road for winning, and all the other contestants who fought hard to be here in this competition.
As for me, I´m gonna return to my activities and keep studying ... Check out www.iam-thepassenger.com. This is gonna be my base of operations. I´m gonna post some stories and other things there. There are other characters I wanna develop there.
I´ll try to continue with The Passenger (I´m still writing scripts and deciding the web format for this webcomic - I think I´m gonna announce some news about it soon), so any advice or support is welcome. One thing is for sure ... every story in this universe will be no more less than 8 screens, I promise you ... There´s lot to develop here. I hope I can live up to this task ...
Thank you, you are great. Everyone of you.
Alex
Thanks Gabe, for your observations. Well, unfortunately, I guess these eight screens weren´t enough to get people´s interest. Thans for visiting.
I'm with RKB. It doesn't have a comic book flavor to it. Is that okay to say? The beginning I loved but going on, reading page after page of simple dialogue didn't cut it for me. However, if improved can be quality work maybe not for comic books but a graphic novel so we can get a better picture of what you are saying.
Hi people, just droping a note: The Passenger official website is updated with some information about the main characters and the next episodes. I hope this can show what you can expect from this webcomic. Drop me a line there.
http://www.iam-thepassenger.com
Thanks, johnzakour, BluMaxx and Zero-Optix. It´s good to know you appreciated it. Thanks Zero-Optix, for helping your friend to subscribe and vote for this. This is very welcome.
This story is my favorite of this month's submission... I read it last... I cant wait to see whats up ahead of the road, hehe ...
but i always read the comics before the synopsis. I dont know why i do this but i was confused at first on this story until i read the synopsis...anyways you get my vote and my friend is signing up to vote for you. Its his first time reading here at Zuda.
Probably my favorite art in this month's competition.
Cool story...lotta potential with this plot. Nice artwork too.
toninneri, Caio RB3, tomstan and fanboy d - Thanks for the support!
would have been cooler with a black cab than a yellow taxi, but maybe it's because i'm a londoner...still, INCREDIBLE and stylish, thumbs up from me.
I love your style of drawing. A very defined work.This is well done.
more one!!
I live there-- or here-- too
Great story man.Your character is very cool.I believe in power of brasilians.I am brasilian too,I live in northeast too,and I know how is hard be a good artist and the market don´t help.
I made many works,now I am making the covers´ colors to, Francinildo sena character,CRANIO,and some stories too.
Bye and good luck.
Ops, I read just now the comments,
Thanks, David, for visiting the website. It´s an honor for me receiving this fine comment from a PRO. Big fan of High Moon, it kick ass! Good luck.
Thanks, Carol and Caio. It wasn´t created specifically for the competition, but the fact the there is a competition helped it to be made. I´ve explained some of this on the comments below.
I totally dig the website you have set up for this strip! Best of luck! There's some real slick talent here!
thanks alex! you are right. and good luck to you too! i am a fan
Fantastic art, Vidal! Very nice job, you created it for Zuda competition?
I adored The Passenger,very perfect and very,very interested.Congratualions for Alexandre Vidal by excellent job.
Thanks, raitec and NinthDoctor.
SamLittle: I´m a big fan of Untrue Tales, it´s a honor to have you here reading this comic.
mrgordon: Man, this fight is like Neo x Smith ... LOL. One following the other´ steps. But the biggest victory is making friends here, I believe. Good luck man!! Be strong!! Your work is fine!!
nice job! I hope you get on the top! lets make more people vote on you! congratulations! good luck!
Great art here. Love the muted colors. Unfortunately, it also suffers a bit in attempting to overcome the language barrier. This would benefit from a more artful translation I think. Very nice effort though.
The switcheroo! Of course you know, this means war! Wait till we get in the top three, then I will extract my vengeance...;p
And I forgot to mention, the story for how the submission came about is the best origin story for a comic I have ever heard.
While I get what you were trying to do at the end there, I think you could've used that last page to give us a bigger taste of this dimension that he just got taken to. Architecture aside, what about this world is so different that getting home is imperative and difficult to do? I think you wasted page 8 on trying to make it more finite. Leaving it open isn't a bad thing, especially if you win. Fantastic art style though. Unique and emotive.
People, just to make things clear ... The final pages of this submission are maybe a bit rushed. This was done in a proposital way. Do you see the last panel from page seven? Well, the second chapter starts immediately from there. We learn about the events that led the main character to discover about his situation. I couldn´t make this clear in only 8 pages. That´s why I gave it a kind of "conclusion" in page 8 ... Because I couldn´t foresse people´s reaction about this comic, so I tried to "end" it ... Maybe that´s why you feel it a bit rushed.
TheNinthDoctor: I really hope this happens, Doc. But I learned to lower my expectations. This is a fun game to play. All the contestants are very good, just being here for me is enough. I feel blessed having been chosen to be among all these incredible artists. Thanks you people for visiting this and commenting, you´re really nice people for caring about my work.
mpd57: Thanks for the support. Well, this month is really heavy ... the quality of the contestants speaks for itself, so I´m not impressed about my position in the ranking.
Neelabh and Neutroncrush: Thanks, people!! I´m glad you liked it! Thanks for the vote and the nice comments!!
jonayre: Yeah, I see you like the artwork. :) Everyone seems to enjoy it a bit. :) Thanks, man, this really makes me proud. But now I´m feeling weird ... Maybe I´m a kinda of Michael Bay for comics, hahahah (beautiful visuals and zero script). Just joking ... LOL.
After reading all of the submissions this got my vote right away. Great art and cool concept!
falexvidal, those comments really clarify the plot of Passenger, and only increase my desire to see more. This is just too good to stay in ninth place. I foresee a jump come next update.
The artwork is absolutely fantastic. Love the feel of it, the vibrancy of the colours and the inventiveness of the layout. Has a real crisp finish to it that I love, and the subtle lighting effects and shading work a treat. A real feast for the eyes that I couldn't take my eyes off. The story telling didn't quite have the same finesse and elegance to it though, and it was this that let it down. It seems so much work has been put into the artwork - so much finishing - and it's a shame that occasionally the wording doesn't have quite the same elegance. For me, wording is absolutely essential - it should have the same time and effort placed on it as a novel, and as there are so few words in a comic in comparison, all the more reason why every word should be carefully considered. On a positive note - if the dialogue was a cool and original and elegant as the artwork I think my brain would have melted.
(Oh - did I say I like the artwork...?)
Damn Good !!
Goooooodddddd!!!
A criminally ridiculous rank for this outstanding comic! I know it only punches a couple of the neccessary buttons that illinest describes so well elsewhere, but the couple of buttons it does punch, well, it punches them out cold!
Illinest: Thanks for being back man. :) Answering your question, this concept was created in 2000, when I met some weird people at night while contacting a cab driver service. I used this service to ride through my city at night, so along the rides I met many weird cab drivers, and I felt that, sometimes, some of them kept kinda of hidden agendas. That´s when the concept was born. I just reworked the original concept to Zuda, as I never had the chance to publish it anywhwere (if anyone ever wants to publish this, I´m open to conversations, LOL).
But you´re right. Eight pages is a difficult task to accomplish successfully when featuring a new idea. Maybe if I started this story showing the conflict that will be stablished in the next few chapters, I could be more successful in content. I´m satisfied with what I´ve got, but I understand the next chapters are more interesting and, maybe, they could please everyone more. Read what I´ve written to NinthDoctor below, there are more tidbits about the story in progress.
Well, just let me tell you that being here and reading all this critique (even it it´s negative) is very pleasant for me. It´s being a hell of an experience. It´s the first time I got the audience´s opinion and interact with them, so I think, for me, it´s being very positive. Even if I can´t win the competition. My goal here is not making a work or pure art ... it´s just entertaining you. I hope I have been successful in this. Thank you!
NinthDoctor: Good doctor, glad you´re back! :) Well ... you´re right, The Passenger is different in tone ... I´m gonna tell you one of my objectives with the character. Remember the 80´s? Evil Dead II, Frigh Night, Mad Max? He´s kinda ... an everyman, just like them. He starts this ride knowing nothing about this place. As he goes further, this place kinda transforms him, turns him into a bad ass player. His kinda Ash ... fighting against a force he doesn´t understand, but as the story goes, he becomes more confident about himself. He becomes kinda a big hero, a legend in this place (just like Mad Max). This can corrupt him, and this is where I wanna get the story (the big question in The Passenger is: will he ever wanna leave the Crossroads? I don´t know).
I couldn´t feature this on these 8 pages, because I love developing from ground zero. So I hope this can clarify you about my real goal. Sirry if I haven´t put so much conflict ... it was kinda my mistake here.
Thanks for commenting, dshide, fruitbat, cleve and nogueira. Well, it´s impossible to pleasure everyone with this, but at least you´ve read it and it kinda moved you (in a positive or negative way). Thanks.
Pretty descent story. I had also read your rely to frequent contributor first which allowed me to have a bit more insight. Can't say I like the art but great effort. I give you a 3.5. If I liked the art more it would be a 4.5. This is not because of then style mind you more about the content and detail. Mainly when dropped of in another dimension I couldn't tell he hadn't ended up in the neighborhood from fight club. It seemed kinda normal to me. Also the dimensional travel panels could have a bit more flair about them. All in all pretty good should be # 4. Believe me when I say the people above you suck (except for Road and Joe Comics).
falexvidal, in responding to frequent contributor you just outlined your concept more succinctly (and more interesting to me as well) than you did in 8 pages of Zuda entry.
He wasn't supposed to be there and there will be consequences.
I really think your entry should have captured some aspect of that if at all possible.
I mentioned Quantam Leap for a very important reason in my first critique. Quantam Leap is a kooky concept but it's a great hook. Easy to understand. He helps someone with their problem and he leaps. Repeat until he gets home.
Your entry may have greater emotional depth than Quantam Leap but it's pretty much impossible to prove that in just 8 pages. I hope that you didn't do yourself a disservice in rushing to make a statement when in my opinion a very simple capsule view of the cab mechanism (and a hint at the impending peril) might have served better to get you through the competition.
I love the craft that you employed, I just think you might have been able to plan for the format better. This begs the obvious question:
Did you rework this for Zuda or was this a Zuda conception right from the start?
@fruitbat: Sonic Screwdriver, thank you. It does much, much more than a pen. It's practically a deus ex machina machine.
The best Who device ever is the Timey Wimey detector. As the Tenth put it, "It goes ding when there's stuff."
Passenger is definitely it's own unique scifi. People are comparing it to Dr. Who, which I must say is *somewhat* true in tone- they're both more Science Fantasy, and both fairly light, but Passenger seems to be much more comedic.
Nice job, man! The art is pretty cool, and the story reminds me something like "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" and "Back to the Future" style.
Go ahead and make brazilians proud!
Parabéns, cara!
story isn't as strong as concept and art. C+
Bottom panel, page 7... best panel EVER!!! The rest so-so... neet concept... Dr. Who in a cab without his TimeLord pen?!
frequentcontributor: Well it´s just an introduction. In 8 screens it´s difficult to show the whole story and make something at least easy to follow. I prefered to give an introduction, where the main element is established (a lost man into a weird labyrinth). How it´ll be developed it´s the question. And the point here is ... It´s not Sliders or Star Trek or Back to The Future. Or Doctor Who, or Planet of The Apes. Forget about them. It´s one man´s personal journey, it has his own conflicts, and follows a totally different path from these shows or movies. I can´t just show you the beginning, the middle and the end in just 8 screens, so be patient. The only thing I can tell you is that it´s not your common action or sci-fi story. Believe me. The premise may be similar, but the development is totally pointing to another direction. The only thing I can tell you in advance is ... he couldn´t be there. His ride was a wrong thing, and he´s gonna pay for that.
evenancio, haulison and carlbberg: Thanks for the compliments. They´re great!